January 2010
124 posts
Everybody knows New Year’s really took place in March.
2010: Now more than ever.
December 2009
89 posts
HNY, Aussies!!
Two Girls, One Comfort Wipe
.@richms Doh. Got me there. ‘televi’ then!
Dear Brits, Hurry it up and have New Year’s so I can watch Doctor Who.
iPod’s text prediction is teh suck. If I type ‘telev’, what the hell other common word might I be spelling than television? Cough it up.
Unicorn demi-glace FTW.
So, Rush Limbaugh has a heart?
No, I don’t think my toothpaste should come in a whole grain version. Just in case you were about to ask me.
I wonder if Rush headed to Hawaii for the excellent health care, low premiums? http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/17/health/policy/17hawaii.html
Happy New Year, New Zealanders! How is it so far?
Turning up the heat for the sole reason of having a beer and not starting to shiver as a result of it. Harpoon UFO Raspberry Hefeweizen
RT @WBEZ: Today is Carl Kasell’s last newscast. Listen to his “exit interview” with Gabe Spitzer: http://www.wbez.org/Content.aspx?audio …
Apparently, one cannot order panda to go at Panda Express. “Excuse me, sir?” #fb
RT @simonpegg: ‘Wihelm scream’ just used in Triffids. Congrats to the sound designer. Always good to hear.
On the Cth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… #nerdhumor
Think I’m going to call in sick today to places where I’m not employed or “McDonald’s? Yeah. Suck it! I quit!” and hang up immediately.
If a Pope is knocked over in a forest and no one is there to hear, is the bear Catholic?
Losing followers because spammers are getting killed or people are finally wising up to my shenanigans.
I’d like everyone to know I invented the term #crotchbomber but have no proof of this fact. So forget I said anything.
“Sir. Sir! Please. No tackling of terrorists in the final hour of the flight. Please remain seated or we cannot ensure your safety.”
Waking up from approx day and a half of rest/sleep. Fell ill on x-mas afternoon. Yay, x-mas!! Le tired.
Thanks Detroit #FAIL bomber. Now we’ll all have to remove our pants at TSA checkpoints too.
Screw abstinence-only. “Abstinence proponents look for aid from new health bill” - washingtonpost.com http://bit.ly/7Fn5xg #fail
There will be papercuts and blood.
Merry Mithramas!
Christmas Eve. Time to wrap presents! Well, after I read tweets, watch YouTube, check myfacebookspace, eat cookies, pick my nose, pick yours
THE SPICE COOKIES MUST FLOW!
Parishioner pushes pontiff. Pews paralyzed. Papal pusher pacified. Pope perambulating. Psycho punishment possible? Papal police perturbed
Since I’ve an international audience here, happy whatever you’re celebrating. Please don’t spoil things by telling me what I received.
RT @billmaher: Mithra - b. 12/25, 12 dscpls, died-rose on 3rd day, miracles, known as Lamb, “the way the truth the light” 600 yrs bef. JC
I lost 2 followers today since the health care vote ended. Death panels got them, obviously.
Hope they add clause that says if you object to HCR, you aren’t eligible for any of its benefits.
Sen. Nelson defending his vote for HCR now. I say If abortions aren’t covered then we should stop covering Viagra Rxs.
Watching @jeriellsworth in one window, C-SPAN 2 in another. http://www.c-span.org/Watch/C-SPAN2.aspx Rock!!!
Health care reform passes 60-39. That’s a gift for lots of uninsured people.
Just discovered @ArianeSherine. Comedy writer, atheist, atheist bus campaign creator, beautiful. I am in love! http://www.arianesherine.com
Shit better get here today, Amazon.com, or none nobody get no x-mas gifts from me.
The true reason for the season is cookies.
If you didn’t get a x-mas card from me, don’t worry and wonder if it’s been misdelivered. Its absence merely indicates that I hate you.
I see absolutely no reason why bacon cannot be involved in a turducken. Furthermore, why wasn’t it involved in the first place?
Being an atheist doesn’t seem to get me out of giving gifts at x-mas. le sigh.
As I watched Avatar, all I could think was “Tiger would hit that”.
RT @bre: DIY pinball by @jeriellsworth http://bit.ly/5e5Vqi
Avatar = A Blue Man’s Burden
Connecticut plowing stopped due to threat of Joe Lieberman filibuster. Senate Dems compromise with plan to hand out shovels.
Boy, it was snowy in NYC today. How snowy? It was so snowy in NYC that muggers wouldn’t rob you unless you shoveled a path for them.
It was so snowy in NYC that when Lindsay Lohan heard there was a lot of white stuff on the ground, she bought plane tickets east.
Every year, ancient Roman right-wingers railed against the War on Saturnalia, mainly to sell papyrus.